In most of the utensil using world, grown men and women with no apparent physical limitations approach plates of spaghetti, fettuccine, and other long pastas with fork in one hand, large spoon in the other.
In Italy, only small children and those challenged by small motor skills would place a spoon in opposition to the twirl of the fork. I’ve queried many of my Roman, Milanese, and Calabrian friends on the subject. They all concur that it’s sort of like training wheels on a bicycle: once the child – or determined adult -gets the hang of snagging the right amount of pasta along with the required number of rotations, it’s time to drop the spoon and go solo with the fork.
If this just doesn’t work for you, then better to ask for a spoon that to use the knife to cut your spaghetti into little bite-size pieces, a serious infraction of Italian culinary laws at any age.